Stop Signs and Green Lights

Over the past year I have gotten into a program called "Dressing Your Truth"(DYT). Along with Stress Management, it has helped me to come to really understand myself. But it's not to say that this isn't an ongoing process. Over the past few months I have learned some important things about myself that I'd like to share with you.

When we first arrived in Guatemala, I thought I was understanding who I was, but little did I know I would face some challenges that would turn me to find the opposite.  In the DYT program there is a lot taught about coming to understand your true nature as an individual as well as your dress to go along with it. I had been doing all of this, or so I thought, until just recently. I found myself wondering a lot about my self worth and wondering if I am important or special. This is a constant battle of mine coming to understand and feel of my worth as I'm sure it is with many men and women. In trying to understand these things I have learned over the past few days, something that has already made a huge impact on me and will continue to help me through my journey through life. 

I was talking with my sister-in-law Liesel the other day and we started talking about stop signs. Weird huh? Well, let me explain. Liesel was talking about how she has noticed that she has put up some stop signs in her own life and was working to correct those stops signs and turn them into green lights. I started wondering what are the stop signs I have put up in my own life?  Then I started to recognize that I have put up stop signs EVERYWHERE. A stop sign with money. Thinking we will never have enough. Recently, a stop sign in making friends with the Mayan people. Thinking I can't trust anyone. There are many more signs that I have put up and I'm still finding them, but the biggest stop sign I noticed that has been really affecting me, is the stop sign of my self worth.

These stop signs are core beliefs that I have about myself and about life.  This core belief that I have found is, that I believe that I don't deserve anything. I don't believe that I am important or that I have worth. When I realized this I decided that it was time to make a change. It's just a simple change that I've made, but it's been a way that has been very effective in other areas of my life and has already helped me to understand what I really believe.

In my study with stress management I have found that the biggest stress management technique and one of the most effective ways to manage your stress, is through forgiveness.  So, one morning I took the time to just forgive. To say out loud that "I forgive myself for believing that I am of no worth. I forgive myself for thinking I have to prove myself to others.  For thinking that other people know me better then I know myself.".

I spent the early hours of the morning forgiving and expressing gratitude out loud for myself and for the blessings in my life and I found that I had more confidence and I felt better about myself.  Now, I do this often it's not like my life changed dramatically and will stay that way after one morning, but by telling myself out loud everyday that I am of worth, that I forgive myself for thinking these things and I express gratitude for myself, things got better and are continuing everyday to get better. 

I am finding that not only is dressing your truth a great step, but understanding my nature is one of the most important things as well as letting go and expressing love to myself.  My hope in sharing this experience with you is that you come to find that you are special and you are unique. That you are important and that you can be the kind of person that you've always wanted to be. It's amazing what the power of forgiveness and gratitude can bring and by eliminating those stop signs one at a time, those green lights come into play and there's a little more light shining throughout the day.

Y is for Yuck! and Z is for Zzzz's

First off, I wasn't able to finish the A to Z challenge in April so I wanted to finish it up by adding Y and Z now. 

Y is for Yuck! On the day I was suppose to post Y, we were headed to Guatemala City. We took a shuttle to the airport to drop off Allie, my sister-in-law, and then headed to pick up our passports. After a long wait we finally got our passports renewed and were trying to decide what do with the rest of the day.  I wasn't feeling very well that day so we decided to stay a hotel for the night and it was a good thing we did, because I got really sick with the Flu. YUCK! It was no fun, but if there was one place to sick it was in a hotel.  Our house is great, but it's not the place to get the flu.  Our bathroom is more outside then inside so it would have made it very uncomfortable for me.  In a weird way, it was a great blessing that I got sick the day we were in Guat City.

Z is for Zzzz's.  Being sick I needed to get a lot of rest.  I drank Lot's and Lot's of 7-Up and slept all day and all night.  By morning I was feeling a lot better and even felt good enough to go swimming for a bit at the pool.  It's amazing how one day for rest can fix you up like new.

Although, it wasn't the greatest trip ever, it was a nice break from being in small town Panachel, but after 2 days I was ready to get back to the small town lifestyle. I love living in Guatemala. It is always an adventure.

X is for Xela

Xela  is pronounced like Shay-la. It is also known as Quetzaltenango and is one of the big cities in Guatemala. Here is a little bit of what Xela is like:

Chicken in a basket. Women carry these baskets on their heads all over Guatemala.

Yes, Walmart does exist here. 

Emree and Aunt Allie having fun riding up and down the escalators.

Fast Food strikes again. Didn't think we'd be so excited to see a McDonald's.

One of the many food carts all over town.

View of Xela

One of our favorite parts about vistiting Xela was visiting the LDS Temple. It's such a beautiful and peaceful place to be.

Emree

Emree photo bombed a branch that was visiting the temple for a family sealing. They were so excited to have Emree join them on that exciting day. Some of the people even wanted individual pictures with her. The Guatemalan people sure do love gringo babies. :) 

Just enjoying being together.

Karen trying to be cool like her son Forrest. 

A mural that some people are doing by hand.

 

 

Coca-Cola is pretty big here. Everyone drinks it. They even converted me to it. :) 

I love the little things people sell in the boxes they carry around town. I especially love the flowers and treats. 

 

It was so fun visiting the city of Xela. I love living in such a beautiful country where we can explore all the beauty that it has to offer.

W is for Walking

The main transportation in Pana is your feet. You could take a tuk tuk or a bus, but the easiest and cheapest way to get around is by walking.  Walking is one of my favorite things to do and not only that it's a healthy way to get around. When people come to Panjachel and stay for a while, they find that within a few months the pounds start shedding off.  Why is this? Part of it is your diet. There really isn't much processed food here so you are eating more fruits and vegetables. Your portion sizes are considerably smaller as well, but one of the biggest reasons people drop the weight is by walking.

Walking has helped me in so many ways in my life.  It's a great stress reliever for me and is a nice way to get away for just a minute to be on my own.  I often go on walks to find a peaceful place to just sit and think.

It also is great exercise. Something about getting out there and moving helps you to feel better about yourself and about life.  I find that the days I don't walk I am much more cranky and irritated than the days that I go out and do something.

I love walking. It's one of the easiest things you can do to improve your health physically as well as mentally. If you are thinking of taking a trip to Panajachel, enjoy your experience here by walking through town and seeing the sights. :)

V is for Vivir

Vivir is to live in Spanish. Sometimes life throws you curve balls when you least expect it. It's a journey full of hardships and trials, but also fun adventures.  Moving to Guatemala was one of those curve balls that was thrown at us. It wasn't easy picking up and leaving everything we knew behind and packing only 2 large suitcases and 2 carryon's as our only belongings, but it's been a ride that we have absolutely loved despite the struggles we have faced. 

We've met incredible people, we are learning more and more Spanish everyday, I've learned to do laundry by hand and we've learned to just do with what we have and enjoy the simple things in life. There are so many more things that we've learned through our journey through life that has helped us grow. It's been an amazing ride so far. Even though the lord threw us a curve ball in coming to Guatemala, it's been one of the best experiences that I've ever had in my life!

U is for Unique

Like any culture, there is something unique about the people in Guatemala. One of the things that makes them unique to me is how laid back and kind they are. 

Every Sunday when we go to church our daughter Emree is hyped up with energy. She's running all over the place and sometimes it's just not worth chasing her up and down the small isles.  The people don't mind her running around the room, because they recognize her energy and enjoy watching and playing with her throughout the meetings. 

I think it is so great that they don't mind helping you out in the middle of the meeting. Some of the ladies have even rushed out with us to help calm Emree down when she is throwing a temper tantrum. I love that I don't feel so embarrassed to have my child screaming her guts out. Back in Utah, I would do everything I could to make we didn't draw much attention to ourselves. You don't see too many people helping you take care of your child in the middle of the meeting there.

Another unique thing I've found is that they don't mind doing the same thing day after day.  I get bored if I don't have something new to do or somewhere to go each day. They usually establish their routine and it stays that way throughout their life.  The sad thing is sometimes there isn't much progression in learning or growing when you do the same thing day after day.

There are so many things that make these people so unique and I love watching and learning from these wonderful people. 

T is for Travis

Travis is my best friend. I wouldn't be the person I am today if it wasn't for him. We've had many trials in the 2 1/2 years we've been married, but through it all we've stuck it out and we've grown from all the experiences that we've had.

Travis is a good man with a good heart. He is strong, he is dedicated and he is the hardest worker I know.  While we've been here in Guatemala, Travis has worked almost every day since we got here (except Sundays of course) working almost 60 hours a week. He's not your average worker.  He goes above and beyond what is asked of him and makes sure the job gets done.  Through all the sweat and aching muscles, not once has Travis complained. He just keeps going with a smile on his face enjoying every moment he has to be here.

Not only does he work hard, but he is a wonderful husband and father.  He comes home and he helps me with the household chores, makes dinner for us sometimes and he makes sure that he gets his daddy daughter time with Emree. He has so much love for us and we are so blessed!

Travis is a wonderful man who is so kind and loving. He is a great example to me.  He is a friend to all and is always focused on helping others in anyway that he can. He is very faithful to the Gospel and loves his Savior with all of his heart.

I love Travis more then anything and I am so grateful to have him in my life!